18-year-old high schooler refuses to walk at graduation, have a graduation party, attend a graduation dinner, or go on a graduation trip: 'As you can imagine, no one is on my side'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Feb 15, 2025 6:00 PM EST

Graduations can be hit or miss. There's something beautiful about the end of an era being marked by a big celebration where you don a funny hat. It gives a sense of completion to all of the years you spent slaving away on your degree. 

My graduations were hit and miss. I liked my high school one a lot better than my college one, probably because I was a lot more excited about finishing high school than college. It felt like my entire family was in town to celebrate, I got to sing the alma mater with the choir, and the sky was a stunning pink the night of graduation. At my college graduation, I was one of tens of thousands of students getting my degree. It was hot as a leather car seat on a summer day, and the speaker was so mediocre. While these weren't the best days of my life by any means, I'm glad I attended. 

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  • The teen in this story is not keen on his graduation ceremony or any of the accouterments that came along with it. Instead of compromising by going on a graduation dinner or trip, he flat-out refuses to do a single thing that would make his family or friends happy.

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    Cheezburger Image 10468312832
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    AITA for refusing to walk at graduation, attend my graduation party, or go on a graduation trip?

    I(18M) am a high school senior. To say that high school has bee rough for me would be an understatement. It's been extremely stressful with my hardest classes being required to
    via u/Throwawaynograduatio
  • 03
    graduate. It was so stressful that i decided that a stupid piece of paper with my name on it is not worth all this stress. As a result, i have decided to not acknowledge my graduation in any way, shape, or form.
    via u/Throwawaynograduatio
  • 04
    I do not want to walk at graduation. Both my parents and my older sister(22F) are frustrated with me and we've gotten into numerous arguments about it. The way i see it, it's my graduation and i can go/not go as i see fit. Last September, when it was time for seniors to buy
    via u/Throwawaynograduatio
  • 05
    their caps and gowns, my mom gave me some money to buy it. When they weren't looking, i snuck the money back into her purse. This week is the time for seniors who are not walking to confirm that they are not. So, i plan to do that.
    via u/Throwawaynograduatio
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    I also don't want a graduation party. This has somehow ped off my parents more then me not walking since my mom went all out with my older sister's graduation party and she was really looking forward to doing that again. We've had a few
    via u/Throwawaynograduatio
  • 07
    arguments about that but i eventually said that, if they throw me a graduation party, i will not attend and all gifts will be returned. They tried to "compromise" by saying that they'll just take me out to a nice dinner but i've turned that down to because It would still be celebrating my graduation.
    via u/Throwawaynograduatio
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    Cheezburger Image 10468324864
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    My parents planned to gift both me and my older sister a graduation trip to any place we choose. I have forfeited the trip but they are refusing to take a hint. They've asked me on numerous occasions where i want to go and i keep telling them that i forfeit. You'd think that they would be happy that they don't have the spend a whole bunch of cash on an expensive holiday but i guess not.
    via u/Throwawaynograduatio
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    As you can imagine, no one is on my side. My older sister has been urging me to reconsider and saying that, if i don't make the most out of my graduation, i'll regret it for the rest of my life. My grandparents have called me a brat and said that, even if i do change my mind, they won't give
    via u/Throwawaynograduatio
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    me anything for my graduation after how i've been acting. My best friend has been pleading with me to reconsider but i shut that down by saying that i won't go to his graduation party if he brings it up again. AITA?
    via u/Throwawaynograduatio
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    Cheezburger Image 10468327168
    via Christopher Campbell

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    Imchatterbox • 5d ago • Edited 5d ago P rintendant [63] Top 1% Commenter You are only being an AH to yourself. You have every right to make this choice, but I do not understand turning down happy fun things for yourself because you are bitter about high school. This seems based out of bitterness and depre s on, not sound judgment and reason. Editing to add that I am not talking about the graduation ceremony or party necessarily. I mean the meal and travel anywhere of your choice.
    via u/Imchatterbox
  • 14
    foreverfal55 Agreed. OP has the right to do this, but the reasoning is what concerns me. They decided a piece of paper isn't worth all this stress...but if they passed their classes and are being offered all this graduation stuff then they did actually earn the diploma. I've certainly known people who thought the diploma was not worth the effort of going to class, so they dropped out of school and didn't earn said diploma. Didn't walk because they didn't graduate. It's almost like OP wants to pr
    via u/foreverfal55
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    PikaV2002 High school is a traumatic memory for the OP and the graduation being back the memories of all the trauma and stress, and they'd rather move on to a new chapter of their life- that's how I see it. It's perfectly valid.
    via u/PikaV2002
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    AnnoyedAF2126 They say it was stressful because of hardest classes, etc. That is quite different from trauma, and seems like a bit of an overreaction to something fairly normal?
    via u/AnnoyedAF2126
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    Mean-Act-6903 I was really bitter at HS graduation and didn't walk either because it felt like it was only for my parents and I hated them, but turning down a trip is just shooting yourself in the foot. I also skipped my surprise birthday party for my 18th out of feeling like an angry outsider and that was definitely a mistake. OP is angsty and I don't think they're wrong for that but take the trip anyway!
    via u/Mean-Act-6903
  • 18
    wino12312 My youngest didn't want anything to do with graduation. He had so many health issues and almost all his friends had already graduated. He hasn't regretted and no one cared. I reminded him of all the money he was missing, he did t want it. OP, NTA. You do you and be happy. But I would take the trip. That can be thank nightmare is over trip. god that
    via u/wino12312
  • 19
    ChurrosPotatoes Yes. Graduation is about you. But it's not ONLY about you. They were your support system through it all. And they want to see you at your highest point, with your greatest accomplishment until now, the culmination of all your work. Why didn't you just drop out and not do sxhoool if you think it's not worth the stress?
    via u/ChurrosPotatoes
  • 20
    They're just trying to have you experience something that's maybe once in a lifetime for many. And avoiding it for really no reason other than "I don't want to" is an ah move. You won't regret not going, but you'll regret the fractured relationships in the future if you remain this way. Edit: Stop being a tight a and let people celebrate you lol
    via u/ChurrosPotatoes
  • 21
    TowelSpecific4498 A different take. I wonder if OP has actually met the graduation requirements. Lots of drama about rejecting not only attendance at the ceremony but also ALL recognition of it. And the sentence about how all the required courses were the hardest. Meaning what? Open to lots of interpretation. Sounds as if it goes sideways the OP can say to parents, grandparents, gift giving friends...no harm no foul.
    via u/TowelSpecific4498
  • 22
    Benoit Dip Right. This isn't about being an a_h_le this is about being immature. sometimes adults really do have a better perspective on things given their life experience even though people on Reddit don't wanna believe it. Op will most likely come to regret this decision down the road and they are trying to save op from that regret.
    via u/BenoitDip
  • 23
    rizloski I didn't go to any of my graduations and I have zero regrets. Some ppl just aren't into the whole thing...I forgot they even existed until I saw this post
    via u/rizloski
  • 24
    Lhasa ApsoSmile YTA - light. I get that it was a hard year. You earned something through your own hard work. The ceremony is a celebration of YOU. There are so few points in life where people genuinely celebrate YOU. Take this. Now - sit down and think about the times this year when you were maybe not so nice to your family
    via u/LhasaApsoSmile
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    because of the stress? This may also be a celebration they need to know that your tough year is done. At a minimum, go to the ceremony, Think about what you want for your future. Is there a celebration or trip or gift that would help you look toward the future? The fact is the year was not that bad because you succeeded in what you needed to do. This is a win.
    via u/LhasaApsoSmile
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    Y2Jake I think op is dealing with some mental health issues, and needs some help. Struggling through school is real, but denying and refusing to celebrate your success is very much a self destructive issue borne of depre son. Go to counseling, get some help, don't take it out on your family.
    via u/Y2Jake
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    SavingsRhubarb8746 There are plenty of ways to celebrate getting through school other than going through all those ceremonies and parties. Throwing out all the notes and old tests and assignments and moving on in life is one way.
    via u/SavingsRhubarb8746
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    lynypixie You can technically do what you want, but you will likely regret it in the long run. My husband did not do anything graduation related, and he regrets now. Graduating is an achievement. It is your moment to say << I did it, I survived this ». There won't be second chances. You do sound very bitter. I think you might need to talk to a professional about your issues, because it will consume you and you will not find happiness if you keep on this path.
    via u/lynypixie
  • 29
    bgthigfist I didn't want to do the graduation thing in college but came to realize that it was important to my mom so I did the boring dog and pony show. After all she did for me, I felt I needed to do that for her.
    via u/bgthigfist

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teens family drama high school graduation student graduation students sisters teenagers high school family grandparents sister mom immature high schoolers
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